Run the full monthly number before deciding. Rent or mortgage is only the loud cost; the quiet costs are what wear you down. In New Jersey, town choice matters more than outsiders realize. Two towns ten miles apart can feel like different lives. Before committing, test the weekday version: school drop-off, grocery routine, commute, doctor access, and evening energy. It did get easier, but not because everything became perfect. It got easier because we stopped expecting the move to solve every problem.