I was the spouse without the built-in job structure, and that made the move harder than people expected. Irvine makes family logistics easier, but it can also make comparison culture louder if you let every other parent’s schedule influence you. The move became better when we stopped comparing the new place to the old one and started building repeatable routines. The first few months were not a fair test. They were setup, loneliness, paperwork, and too many small decisions.